I am telling ya’ll that all these tests are wearing me out! I’ve had a biopsy, and an MRI of my head, and today I get to go in for a PET Scan. Yay me! The fun part of the pet is not the scan itself – but the wait for the test… you see, you have to be “fasting” for this particular test. Absolutely nothing but water (which, by the way, is encouraged) for six hours prior to the test… Which wouldn’t be so very bad – IF the test were at say 9 am… but no – today my test is at 3:30. So I have to get up and go through my entire day without any coffee or food. I usually eat my breakfast/lunch around 12 every. single. day.
This is disturbing my body clock… and my body is not at all amused. And the other best part of the test? Oh these get done in between chemo/radiation rounds to determine if the drugs are working… so I see plenty more of these bad boys in my future.
*Sigh*… so I’m starting to see why cancer really sucks. The idea of dying isn’t even remotely as disturbing to me as the invasiveness of this disease. I have dozens of people all up in my bodies business… tracking its every change…. I have holes in every single vein in my left arm that can be punctured – and one of those veins is so sore I can barely move my hand… seriously? I was poked in the same vein 3 times this week!!!! It becomes painfully obvious to me why so many people just say to heck with it and give up on this “treatment” thing… because honestly just the tests leading up to any kind of treatment have made me dislike the medical profession immensely. I know it’s not their fault – and they’re doing the best they can to keep me alive to dance with my grandchildren at their weddings. But… I have come to the firm conclusion that cancer sucks – for many reasons. And death is the least of those.
Tuesday March 4, I will have answers. Finally, the questions that have plagued me for two weeks will be answered. My entire future will be determined in a 20-30 minute conversation with my physician.
Please continue to pray, send positive vibes and energy, and love & light my way – I’ll take it all!