A-Z Blogging Challenge – April 8


a-to-z-letters-g

G is for Going All Out

Going all out… giving it your all… pushing boundaries… making the most out of any given situation.
For so long in my life the idea of going all out was foreign to me. Well, not really foreign… I went all out, or all in at work for sure. But in other aspects of my life I was just there. Existing but not truly living. Not giving it everything I had.
Now, don’t get me wrong – I have always been, and always will be “all out” with my kids and grand kids… but for myself – it just wasn’t what I did. As long as those around me had what they needed, were happy, and satisfied I was good. I didn’t need to focus on myself.

Boy… was I ever wrong. Last year, a long time friend told me that I was not the same person she’d known 10 years ago… No, I guess I wasn’t. I had given up. I wasn’t going all out any more. I was on the tail end of ten years of a life I really didn’t want to live. Settling for less because that’s all I though I was worth. I was depressed, anxiety ridden, and laden with guilt for feelings I couldn’t control.

I couldn’t discuss my feelings with anyone then, everyone around me was too close to the situation to look at things objectively – and to encourage me to do what was really right for me.

As time crept by, and my depression deepened I realized that only one that could pull me from the abyss was me; I had to make some tough choices… and I had to Go All Out to make changes that benefitted me.

Now, looking back at the other side of the situation, sure – things may have been done differently and the same result come of it all. However, when the choices were made and the deed was done – it was best for me, and really for everyone else involved.

In the end… I learned that if you’re going to have the life you really want for yourself, be who you really need/want to be you can never stop putting everything you have into everything you do. You have to Go All Out!

How are you living? Are you all out? All in? Are you living it to its fullest; or are you settling for what’s comfortable because you don’t want to “rock the boat”?

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